shinerspeak - Ken's definitive guide

Since retiring as chancellor of this club, I've been relaxing in my special velour armchair kindly installed for my use by the landlord of the Port 'N' Ale pub, I've often overheard conversations by my club colleagues talking what I'd term as "SHINER SPEAK".
Now this has got me thinking, (oh lordy, lordy ). Say you are on a rally standing next to some of our lot in a marquee or in a camping field wondering what the hell we are on about, you need worry no more. I have devised the SHINER SPEAK list to assist you.
So could I suggest you print of some copies of this list, hand them to your buddies, and when out & about on rallies, camping weekends etc. this list can be referred to as and when needed.

TERM	DEFINITION
Rule one	Occasionally our club members have to be reminded by others That "rule one" i.e. taking the piss applies at ALL times.
No Frills	Name given to Anchor pub at High Offley
E & T	Engine & Tender pub at Broome, Shropshire.
Kanga	Kangaroo Inn at Aston-On-Clun
Fuse	Fusilier pub in Great Bridge, now reverted to it's original name of Nags Head.
Noisy pub	The Limerick in Great Bridge. (Rarely used these days) - Now called "The Lounge"
Port	Port 'N' Ale pub where the club used meet every Thursday.
The Mouse	Wight Mouse pub on Isle Of Wight.
Cheese shop	Kings Arms pub in Tipton. Alas no longer standing. So named Because it never had any beer!
Mobile phone bridge	Only place at No Frills pub where you can get a signal for your Mobile, or cellfone if there are any Americans reading this
Slapper of the South	Moonshiners proposal for a southern alternative to the Angel Of The North statue in Gateshead
Her who should be infested	Or to give it it's full title- "Her who should be infested with the fleas of a thousand camels" - relates to various ex wives & girlfriends
Bridgo	Bridgnorth, Shropshire
Car club	Unauthorized 'outlaw' section which has, in the past infected our club. We now have in place 'anti outlaw' rules to eradicate this menace
Big Chief Talking Bollox	Bullshitter
Talking bollox	Talking bullshit
Weasel Proof box	Plastic tupperware box for campers
Old Prick	Man of mystery- very rarely heard these days
Young Craig	Son of Old Prick
Tile of Wight	Isle of Wight
Tile of Man	Isle of Man
Canoes	Used usually by the more nautically minded members of our club
Let's fly a kite - I know a short cut - let's walk up Snowdon.	Usually spoken by our more 'child-like' minded members. This is usually followed by a reply of " F*#k Off "
B31 - B33 - A10 - A65 - M20 - M21	Nothing to do with Birmingham Post codes or UK main roads, but British Bikes. (before my time!)
Bonnies - Ajays - Bantams	Various British bikes - If you look closely, and you are very lucky, you may see members going all dewy-eyed. Also rose tinted spectacles have been known to make an appearance.
Cheer	Nothing to do with any celebration, but referring to a side-car
Dooks - Big Red Ugly Bike - Bacon Slicer - Beemers - Wings - Harleys - Etc. Etc.	Other bikes of club members
Fast Plastic - Rice Rocket	Japanese race replica bikes.
Freds	Our friendly MOT club member's workshop